12/27/15
Today we celebrate the Holy Family. When our Heavenly Father sent Jesus to us to reveal his love and show us the way to him, he didn’t just drop Jesus out of heaven as a full grown adult ready to begin his ministry. He sent Jesus as an infant born as a member of a family; the Holy Family of Nazareth. Joseph, Mary, and Jesus are put before us by the Church today as a model for our families.
This time of year when families are reunited, it’s a good time to reflect on what it means to be a family. The family is the basic unit of society. It is in the family where all of our basic needs as human beings are met. It is in the family where we first learn right from wrong; what is good and what is bad. It is in the family that we learn what love is, and how to love, because it is in the family that we first receive love. It is in the family that we learn that conflicts can occur, and we also learn to forgive. It is in the family where we first learn about God, Jesus, and Mary, and where we first learn to pray. It is in the family that we learn to value ourselves, to value all other people, and to value the world we live in; picking up our values from what is done or not done, and what is said or not said by our parents.
There are many attempts to destroy the family in our times, and if the family is destroyed in our society, our society will crumble, because all humanity comes through the family. There are many attempts to redefine the family, but they do not reflect God’s plan for the family.
As we read scripture, we see that God has revealed a great deal to us about his plans for the family. In the book of Genesis we hear that from the beginning God made them male and female and then said, “This is why a man leaves his father and mother and becomes attached to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. They are no longer two but one flesh.” These are very clear words about God’s plan. And so what else does scripture tell us? In St. Paul’s letter to the Ephesians’ we read that husbands are to love their wives as much as Christ loved the Church. So, husbands and wives, is your love a reflection of the love that Christ had for the Church? St. Paul’s letter goes on to say, “Children, be obedient to your parents in the Lord. That is what uprightness demands.” Children, do you love your parents and always do what you are told? The letter goes on to say, “Parents, never drive your children to resentment.” Parents, do you love and respect your children, treating them fairly, whatever their age? It’s the parents’ responsibility to be the best possible example for their children. We desire our families to be the best possible families for our children so they may get the best possible start in life. So, are our families fulfilling God’s plan for the family; and if not, why?
As human beings, we are far from perfect. And I’m sure very few families live up to the standards of the Holy Family. It’s not easy living up to God’s plans for us. Every family faces obstacles at times that they must overcome, but it is something we must strive for, for the good of humanity.
Thank God we have the Holy Family to look up to for inspiration. Just as every family faces problems; Joseph, Mary, and Jesus also faced their own problems. Starting before Jesus was born, when Mary conceived through the
Holy Spirit, Joseph was planning to divorce her before an angel intervened in a dream. When Jesus was born they had to take shelter in a stable with farm animals. Then the family had to flee to Egypt as refugees because Jesus’ life was in danger due to Herod, in much the same way as refugees are fleeing Syria, and other war-torn countries in today’s world. Joseph and Mary lost Jesus for three days when he was twelve, only to find him in the synagogue. And there are many other stories of trials for them all through scripture, up to the point where Mary had to witness her son die on a cross.
What kept the Holy Family together through all of these trials? The answer is love, ——-for each other, and love for God the Father. Love is what will also hold our families together in times of trouble and distress; love and the ability to forgive. It is only love which triumphs in the end.
As we celebrate the Holy Family today, let us also reflect on what it means to be holy. If our idea of a holy family is that we have to be perfect, a family full of love, peace, and joy; no angry words, no fighting, no hurt feelings; a family where no one ever needs to say “I’m sorry”, where kids always obey, husband and wife always agree; if that’s your idea of a holy family, then I don’t think there would be any hope for any of us. What makes us holy is that we let God be at the center of our life as a family. Just as Joseph and Mary had to say yes to God, God asks us to let him be at the center of our families, and we have to say yes. Children mustn’t find God only at Church; they must find God primarily in their families. That doesn’t keep us from living normal, ordinary, and imperfect lives, where we often fall short of God’s plan for the family; but if we let God be in our family and try hard to follow his ways, that’s what makes us Holy. No family is perfect whether it’s a traditional family with a father, a mother and children, or one of the many other versions of family in today’s society; single parent, divorced, widowed, step families, or blended families, we all fall short of the Holy Family of Nazareth. As we honor them today, we should be encouraged to strive for that ordinary holiness that is within all of our grasps, even if we have a long ways to go. The challenge for all of us today is to reflect on how we respond to those “unholy” moments in our lives. It seems that so often, the people we hurt the most are those who are closest to us, our family members. On this Feast day of the Holy Family it’s a day to consider the spiritual life of our families; to ask ourselves “Can all the members of our family find God in our home?” Many families have suffered separation or divorce. These can still be strong, valid Christian families, and maybe even stronger than families where both parents are present, but hostile towards each other. It’s sad to say but there are often absentee parents who still live under the same roof as their families. Just as the Holy Family had to find its way to reflect God in a hypocritical, religious society, every family today has to find its way to God in the situations of today’s’ society.
While preparing for this homily I read a startling statistic; that 60% of the felons in the U.S prison system do not know who their father is. What does that tell us about the importance of family? It’s in our family settings where our personality and character are formed. It’s in our homes where we learn a philosophy of life, where we acquire the principles by which we should live and relate to others. It’s in our family homes where our intellectual formation really takes place.
As we thank God this season for the Christ Child, let us also thank God for our mothers and fathers, our brothers and sisters, and the wonderful gift we have been given, our family.
So, once again I ask, “Are our families fulfilling God’s plan for families? Do our families reflect the love of Christ for the Church?” These are important questions to reflect on because the family we grow up in influences us for the rest of our lives. When families reflect God’s love, they are mighty in the eyes of the Lord. Let us pray that our families reflect God’s plan.